1.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 If a friend tells you how bad her day has been, what is your usual reaction:
\na.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You listen to her without judgment.
\nb.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You offer her a shoulder to cry on.
\nc.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You tell her how much worse your day was \u2013 in vivid gory detail.<\/p>\n
If you answered \u201cc,\u201d you might be a Life-O-Sucter. LLS like all attention to be on them all the time, even in one-on-one interactions. It\u2019s like they\u2019re playing a game called \u201cMy Life Is Worse Than Yours!\u201d\u00a0 If someone has a bad day at work, the LLS has had a bad month or year at work; if someone has a fender bender on the way to the store, the LLS has a brush with death on the freeway. There\u2019s no sob story a LLS can\u2019t top.<\/p>\n
If you find the words \u201cYou think that\u2019s bad? Listen to this<\/em>,\u201d frequently fly from your mouth, you might as well get yourself a cape and fangs. Or you could change your behavior by making a list of alternative phrases to use in these situations. Phrases such as: It won\u2019t be easy to stop yourself from jumping in with all the horrible things that have ever happened to you, but if you keep using the list, you\u2019ll find this monstrous habit will soon be defeated.<\/p>\n 2.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Which of the following words apply to you: If you answered \u201ca,\u201d \u201cb,\u201d or \u201cc,\u201d you may be a Life-O-Sucter. Drama Queens, hypochondriacs, and high-maintenance people are all overly-involved in their own lives and can\u2019t usually find the time to be a positive force for others. And if their lives aren\u2019t dramatic enough, they create drama \u2013 for example, thinking every bump and bruise is cancer or every friend who\u2019s late to lunch has either been killed on the way there or has dumped them.<\/p>\n One of the best ways to stop creating drama where there is none is to help someone else whose life really is rife with stress and drama. Volunteering with an organization like Habitat for Humanity, visiting kids with cancer in the hospital, or helping an illiterate adult learn to read will help convince you that your life is pretty good. And by helping others out, you put positive energy into the universe instead of negative.<\/p>\n 3. \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 Compared to five years ago, do you have: If you answered \u201cC\u201d, you may be a LLS. Eventually Life-O-Sucters lose their friends. Who really wants to stay in a friendship with someone who always one-ups you, never lets you have any attention, and whines more than a puppy left home alone for the first time?\u00a0 Being friends with a Life-O-Sucter is like being friends with a leach \u2013 it\u2019s exhausting, draining, and sooner or later you can\u2019t wait to shake them off!<\/p>\n The best way to reach out to friends who\u2019ve gotten fed up and moved on is to apologize and tell them you want to change your ways. Admit that you haven\u2019t been the easiest person to have as a friend and ask for help to do a better job. Chances they\u2019ll have plenty of advice; all you have to do is be humble enough to listen. To show you\u2019re serious, bring a pencil and paper and take notes! If you answered \u201ca,\u201d you may be a Life-O-Sucter. LLS think that when they\u2019ve finished saying what they have to say, the conversation is over. If you\u2019re always the first to hang up and people have actually asked you why you always slam the phone down in the middle of their sentences, ring-ring, it\u2019s the Life-O-Sucter clue phone!<\/p>\n A visual reminder may be needed to change this bad habit. Print out the question, \u201cWhat else is new with you<\/em>\u201d on a sheet of labels and apply one to each phone in the house (and your cell phone too, if there\u2019s room!)\u00a0 Tell yourself you\u2019re not allowed to hang up on anyone without having asked the question at least once.<\/p>\n 5.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 When it comes to face-to-face interactions, phone conversations, or Instant Messaging, do you: If you answered \u201cc,\u201d you may be a LLS. If the people around you are always starting thoughts, but never completing them, you either hang around with very forgetful people, or they never get a chance to finish what they start because you constantly interrupt them. Life-O-Sucters believe that whatever\u2019s running through their head is more important than anything anyone else has to say.<\/p>\n The best way to stop this bad habit is to let your friends and relatives know you realize you have a problem and ask them to let you know when you\u2019re interrupting them by using a unique code phrase like \u201cFuzzy bunny slippers\u201d or \u201cBrad Pitt.\u201d\u00a0 Anything that will get your attention and stop you mid-thought will work. And if you choose a fun phrase, it will help you keep a lighter perspective while you change.<\/p>\n 6.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Do you usually see the glass: Again, \u201cc\u201d is the Life-O-Sucting answer. Choosing the most negative perspective on life (and it IS a choice) is one of the classic symptoms of being a Life-O-Sucter. If you\u2019re always negative, the only way your relationships work is that other people are putting positive energy out there to feed you. Eventually, they just get exhausted.<\/p>\n Some people keep a gratitude journal to remind themselves of the good things in their lives. I recommend keeping a \u201cGratitude List\u201d on your refrigerator, right next to the grocery list. Every time you think of something good in your life, jot it down on the fridge where you will see it every time you\u2019re in the kitchen. Regular reminders that your life is good overall can help you overcome the negativity fiend.<\/p>\n 7.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Look closely at your face in the mirror. Which do you have more of: If you answered \u201ca,\u201d you may be a LLS. Over the years, Life-O-Sucters tend to develop something I call Irritable Scowl Syndrome. You\u2019ve seen it on people\u2019s faces, maybe even your own. It\u2019s that permanent look of annoyance and irritability right between the eyebrows. It\u2019s no wonder Botox is so popular!<\/p>\n Changing this LLS symptom is relatively easy because you can fake a smile and it will boost your mood, no matter how you really feel. \u00a0Since it\u2019s really hard to smile and frown at the same time, you get at two-for one bonus. And, not only will you feel better, but those around you will feel more positive when you\u2019re around. Not bad for a Life-O-Sucter!<\/p>\n If you\u2019ve noticed lately that people run screaming from the room when you come in or light torches and try to run you out of town, try a few of these tips. Because nobody vants to be a Life-O-Sucter!<\/p>\n Leigh Anne Jasheway-Bryant, M.P.H. has been helping people learn to use their funny bones, their smile muscles, and their optimism to have a better life for fourteen years. She is a nationally-recognized keynote speaker, author of fifteen books, and winner of the 2003 Erma Bombeck Humor Writing Award. Visit her website at www.accidentalcomic.com<\/a>.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n
\nI\u2019m so sorry this happened to you.
\nNo wonder you\u2019re (exhausted, frustrated, angry, etc.)
\nIs there anything I can do to help?<\/p>\n
\na.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Drama Queen
\nb.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hypochondriac
\nc.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 High-maintenance
\nd.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 None of the above<\/p>\n
\na.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 More good friends.
\nb.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 About the same number of good friends.
\nc.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Fewer good friends.<\/p>\n
\n4.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 When chatting with someone on the phone, do you usually:
\na.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hang up as soon as you\u2019re done with what you have to say.
\nb.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Wait until the other person is finished talking before hanging up.
\nc.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hang up at a mutually-agreed upon point in the conversation.<\/p>\n
\na.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Let other people do most of the talking.
\nb.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Hold up your half.
\nc.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Monopolize most of the time.<\/p>\n
\na.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Half full.
\nb.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Half empty.
\nc.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Completely empty, dirty, and you have to wash it.<\/p>\n
\na.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Frown lines
\nb.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Laugh lines<\/p>\n![\"Don't](\"https:\/\/wholeperson.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/08\/Dont-get-mad-get-funny-200x300.gif\")
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\n<\/a><\/p>\n
![\"Are](\"https:\/\/wholeperson.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/are-you-playing-cover-200x300.jpg\")
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