{"id":126,"date":"2010-10-26T11:53:04","date_gmt":"2010-10-26T16:53:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wholeperson.com\/wordpress\/?p=126"},"modified":"2015-11-30T11:31:24","modified_gmt":"2015-11-30T17:31:24","slug":"turn-your-holiday-traps-into-holiday-treasures","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wholeperson.com\/blog\/turn-your-holiday-traps-into-holiday-treasures","title":{"rendered":"Turn Your Holiday Traps into Holiday Treasures"},"content":{"rendered":"

Holiday Traps or Holiday Treasures
\nFrom\u00a0Kicking Your Holiday Stress Habits
\n<\/em><\/a>By Donald Tubesing, PhD, MDiv & Nancy Loving Tubesing, EdD<\/h2>\n

Do eagerly look forward to the holidays? Does your creative, not to mention spiritual, energy expand?<\/p>\n

Or are your holidays filled with too many \u201cshoulds\u201d that exhaust you?<\/p>\n

Take this assessment to identify your Holiday Traps and Holiday Treasures so you can continue the treasures to reduce your holiday stress and change the traps that add stress to your already too-busy life. Circle true or false for each. If it\u2019s difficult to decide, estimate which answer would be 51% true of you.<\/p>\n

1.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You lose control over your activity calendar saying \u201cyes\u201d to all invitations and requests. Each carries a \u201csocial obligation\u201d burden and can overwhelm you. Or the opposite, you sit at home waiting for someone to include you, which doesn\u2019t happen so you\u2019re all alone again.<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

2.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Gift giving is a creative activity for you. You excel at looking through your receivers\u2019 eyes to select something very appropriate for each. You enjoy the planning, shopping and the wrapping of each gift, as well as their appreciation of your choice.<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

3.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You live far away from your family of origin and cannot make it home for the holidays and will deeply miss your family\u2019s holiday traditions. How depressing. OR You and your new mate both have your own treasured holiday traditions. In an attempt to make you both happy you work hard to meld them together, which is more confusing and exhausting than it is comforting and enjoyable. Why does he have to have potato pancakes on Christmas morning? Why can\u2019t he give that up?<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

4.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You love to decorate your home for the holidays. All of the festive sights, smells and sounds energize you. You love hearing from loved ones far away through their cards and can hardly wait to visit and celebrate with those closer to home. It\u2019s all so magical and loving.<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

5.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You give the gifts you hope to receive, while at the same time fear you won\u2019t get what you want. You want so many things and can\u2019t prioritize your preferences. You tend to measure others\u2019 love for you by how many gifts and the expense of each they give to you.<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

6.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You love the busyness aspect of the holidays because it fills you with a sense of purpose and worth. All of the social gatherings reconnect you with your support system that you hold dear. Plus, the extra commitments help you appreciate the solitude and silence when they return.<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

7.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You dread gathering with your family of origin for the holidays knowing that the same old conflicts and pressures will reappear. Your older siblings treat you like you\u2019re still their little sister while your parents trigger everyone\u2019s defenses just like they always have. What a pain!<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

8.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Making the holidays perfect is important to you. Your house, the food and the gifts must be memorable and appreciated. But every year you feel let down when reality doesn\u2019t match your Madison Avenue expectations. You expect yourself to feel loving, joyous and peaceful but find yourself feeling lonely, sad and discouraged.<\/p>\n

True \u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

9.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0One of the many reasons you so enjoy the holidays is that they allow you to get back in touch with your childlike past imbuing the festivities with magic and meaning. You love all of the sights and sounds and the comfort they bring you. You enjoy celebrating your heritage and affirming the love that connects you no matter what has transpired.<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

10. \u00a0The holidays allow you to get in touch with the meaning in your life. The rituals and traditions stimulate spiritual reflection and centering as well as a sense of playfulness, excitement and wonder. You know the traditions can help you through the difficult times even when your feelings don\u2019t quite match the occasion.<\/p>\n

True\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 False<\/p>\n

Scoring directions<\/strong><\/p>\n

Check out whether your \u201ctrue\u201d answers indicate a trap or a treasure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
<\/td>\n\u201cTrue\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Answers<\/strong><\/td>\n

<\/td>\n\u201cTrue\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n

Answers<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

Santa Claus Trap<\/td>\nItem #5<\/td>\nSanta Claus Treasure<\/td>\nItem #2<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Activity Trap<\/td>\nItem #1<\/td>\nActivity Treasure<\/td>\nItem #6<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Tradition Trap<\/td>\nItem #3<\/td>\nTradition Treasure<\/td>\nItem #10<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Life Script Trap<\/td>\nItem #7<\/td>\nLife Script Treasure<\/td>\nItem #9<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Magic Trap<\/td>\nItem #8<\/td>\nMagic Treasure<\/td>\nItem #4<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

1. <\/strong>Santa Claus Trap to Santa Claus Treasure<\/strong><\/p>\n

Gift giving can be fun but can become a major holiday hassle; it takes time when you\u2019re stretched thin already and in today\u2019s economy who can afford them? To help move you from trap to treasure answer these questions:<\/p>\n